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“You complete me.” Most people know the line from Jerry Maguire. What a wonderful scene, right? It triggers thoughts of romance, marriage and happily ever after. It’s the kind of thing I used to dream about. One day I’d find my true love and it’d be magical. He’d think I was the best thing that ever happened to him and he couldn’t live without me. What I didn’t realize was that he was a guy. Unless I was standing in front of him naked with a beer, he probably wasn’t thinking about me. Where did I get those ideas that led to such a rich fantasy life? Our society. When I was in high school I had a friend who carried around a bridal magazine. She was planning her wedding before she had her diploma.

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“Courage doesn’t always roar, sometimes it’s the quiet voice at the end of the day whispering, ‘I will try again tomorrow.” -Mary Anne Radmacher

Dear Arielle,

Yesterday when you told me you didn’t make the team my heart broke for you. I knew it was your dream. I’ve watched as year after year you practiced twice a day putting your training before all else. I knew the lessons you were learning through dedication to your sport were life lessons few got the opportunity to learn, but I also knew that life lessons were not what you were after; PR’s were what mattered.

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I sat at the  airport. Waiting. They needed me. Time slowed as I scanned my memories searching for guidance on how to handle the situation. I came up with nothing. I was on my own. My children were in a terrible car accident while I was in Mexico. My  son escaped with only a rash on his neck from the seatbelt. However, my ten-year-old daughter, Arielle, was in intensive care. We were told she had a bruise on her spinal cord. She couldn’t move her legs.

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We were two hundred and fifty women from around the world. Doctors, teachers, therapists, moms and writers represented just a few of the women I met. The weekend was magical! I attended Spiritual Solutions at the Chopra Center in Carlsbad, California. Generally, upon meeting new people, one of the first questions asked is, “What do you do?” Immediately I felt the difference in being amongst all women when the question was not What do you do? It was, “What brought you here?”

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Not long ago my son texted me asking if I could add money to his account because he was in Gainesville where it was quite a bit cooler than Cape Coral, and he had spent what was left in his bank account on a jacket. Like most kids he knew which parent to text. His dad would’ve let him learn a budgeting and packing lesson. I laughed thinking, well he finally got cold enough to wear a coat. His text brought me back eight years earlier to a time when I was teaching fourth grade. Kai, my son, was in the fourth-grade class next door to mine. My friend was his teacher. We had planned to take all the students to St. Augustine, Florida for a weekend field trip.

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If this post is a little late I’m blaming having 9 dogs in the house. 9! My husband can’t believe we actually have more dogs than cats. That’s never happened in our twenty-five years together.

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